On The Outside Looking In

Every moment i feel as if i'm on the outside looking in as if i'm viewing the world from a television set. I do not know if this makes any sense but i'll explain it more clearly lets say your giong to a party at someones house and everyones inside the house and your standing outside looking in through the window and your looking at everyone and their having a great time talking, laughing, dancing and other things that go down at such parties well thats how it feels for me i'm the person outside of the party looking in at the party.

Wallflower

I came to a realization today as i was running and caught the sight of people i go to school with me playing baseball in the in the rain I realized that i am not a regular teenager now let me elaborate on this statement when I say I am not a regular teenager i mean that i do not get involved in any sports, clubs or after school activities, and i do not do the things that regular teenagers do such as date, go out and get wasted, experiment with drugs, have unprotected sex (you know the usual teenager stuff) anyways what i am instead of the modern teenager is a wallflower going unnoticed and overlooked and i except this because i do not think i could be a regular teenager i wouldn't know how too.

Hiding

I'm Hiding.
Forever Hiding.

Behind a preformance of lies.
I blind you with dazzeling numbers.

For I FEAR you will discover,
The Real me,
The me that HURTS,
The me that LOVES,
The me that HATES.

And that can never happen
Beacuse lets face it NO one likes the
REAl.

Sometimes

Sometimes i feel as though I'm watching TV

when I'm not, it feels like the real world from

my point of view is a TV series and I'm the only

person watching.

Sometimes I think that I'm in a state of

perpetual stasis and everything is

continuing to grow and thrive while i stay

the same.

Sometimes I have the feeling that I'm

missing out on life like I'm on the outside

looking in.

Sometimes I feel like i want to be a normal

teenager and do normal teenager stuff but,

I do not think I know how to.